The issue of the high patronage of telenovelas and other soap operas in Ghana has been going on for a while now. From the days of Acapulco bay, passions, to the top most trending Mexican telenovelas like Esmeralda, Juana la virgin, Rosalinda, Maria de los Angeles, cuando sias mia, el cuerpo de deseo, what life took from me etc. It could be argued that, a lot of time and attention have been generously invested into these soap operas.

Women are mostly renowned for their constant interest in almost anything that fully expresses love coupled with a dose of intense passion; and Ghanaian women are no exception! Our market women (who have now become movie directors and producers in their own right), would sit for hours on end to literally debate and sometimes even argue over some specific scenes which in a way didn’t turn out the way they expected.

However, it is an undeniable fact that the kind of “’dramatic romantic love” depicted in our favorite Mexican telenovelas has greatly affected the psychological thought pattern of Ghanaian women by pushing us to raise the bar of our expectations and also redefining the meaning of true happiness in our marriages and relationships.

Let me just use myself as an example. I was (and probably still is) addicted to series from the Mexican Telemundo, Televisa or whatever the name of the production house is. I never made it a point to miss any of those series but whenever I was hindered by circumstances beyond my control, I trusted UTV, TV3, Metro TV or whichever channel in question to grace me with a cool repetition on a Sunday afternoon. These movies successfully shaped up my thought pattern and gave me a definition of what LOVE should be and feel like. Anytime I saw Fernando Jose fight for the love of Rosalinda in the open or whenever I watched Octavio and Marie Cruz go for a swim in the lake as he gently kissed and caressed her body under the sun, placed those lilies in her hair and tried every single day to make her see how he dearly loved her beyond doubt; I always imagined it being done to me instead.

I can boldly say today, that many of my failed relationships were as a result to paying so much attention to these soap operas. I expected so much from my partners in terms of passion and in our day-to-day activities and whenever they couldn’t make that up to me, I would then conclude with my then popular phrase, “He doesn’t love me enough.”  there were times I would deliberately walk out in an argument and expect my partner to run after me and hug me from behind and whisper in my ears and say “I love you baby, I will never let you go” just like what Mauricio de la vega would tell Juana la virgen… dreamy right?

What we fail to realize as Ghanaian or African women is that, those exhibitions portrayed as love in those series is not the actual deal in reality! There is no running and kissing in the rain with lilies or roses in our hair, there is no swimming naked in the lake forever! In real life, there are arguments, 60% understating and even care, there is stress, there is something called a job which consumes almost your entire life, there is something called space, heart breaks and there are tears… real salty bitter tears which are mostly shed on pillows at night!

The addiction to these telenovelas can literally cause depression. Since they are mostly designed to suit the minds of women, you’d notice that every single scene shows you what you think you might be missing in your real love life; you’re given a new concept of what happiness should be and how your life must go so once you’re denied your new expectation of love, over thinking sets in, then depression comes to stay.

It’s okay to enjoy these series once in a while without getting too involved and attached. We as women should cease to place ourselves in positions where we would be easily swayed and brainwashed to the extent of wrecking our very own marriages and relationships.

It’s okay to love and to desire for happiness in relationships but do not let it be defined by another man’s creation or concept you see on your television. It’s about time we understood that real love in real life is undefined!

BY: Nana Yaa Asabea// email: nayascolumn@gmail.com// instagram: @naya_233// twitter: @naya__233

 

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